Merry Christmas

My mother's family came from Germany- at least her father did- and we always celebrated Christmas in more the German than the American fashion.  We opened gifts on Christmas Eve and on Christmas Day the house was open for visiting,  I suspect this was more because my Dad worked in the Food Service  Industry and he wanted to see us open or presents.  He worked graveyard.

When I was married, my ex would not let me do that.  It all had to be HIS way and HIS traditions.  I think a lot of the reason I am not married to him anymore began with the resentment that I felt around the holidays   Long stories and not really meant for airing anyway, suffice it to say, I have less wonderful and more "oh no he didn't" memories.

I wish my kids were coming in and they had planned to stay HOME this year, but I suspect they will be out here over the next few days.  Christmas at my Ex's house is more than likely NOT happening.   His fiance- the woman who worked so hard to break up my crumbling marriage- died on Sunday unexpectedly.  Collapsed in the grocery store.  Is is BAD to say I am having trouble finding any tears for her?  I know they are grieving, but I am not moved.  I never wished her ill, after I ended the marriage, but I never warmed to her either.  They were engaged for fourteen years.  This Summer I told him he ought to just marry her.  Geez..

Hard at Christmas, in any case.

Chris and I will celebrate quietly this evening and then have friends who are family join us for dinner tomorrow.  We are making lasagna.   It's traditional in my family.  If you are hungry and in the neighborhood....  Dinner s is at 4 (lol)