Angels watching over me

I pulled three cards from my desk of angel card this morning, asa I do sometimes, to get a message of hope or guidance.

Now, some of you don't believe in this and that's just fine, but it's kind of the same thing I also do,in flipping open my Bible ( see I OWN ONE!) and hitting a random verse.

Same messenger IMHO.

Today's message was about courage and strength.  It reminded me that the angels are watching over me and protecting me, that I need to be ready to take my place in guiding someone and loving them.

So... my grandson is getting ready to make his entrance.  I am heading out to 29 to help my daughter and her family .  I wonder if Mason is going to need his Gogo in his life.  His Gogo sure needs him. 


As I get my act together and pack for the trip, I will lean on my angels, maybe even hum the Spiritual we used to sing " All night all day, Angels watching over me, my Lord"

May the angels watch over you as well.

415 days, more or less

This Saturday, I will have held my current job ( with one or two titile and salary changes) for 33 years. 

There are things I love about my job ( people) and things I don't love ( other people 😡😡  )  but this morning, BEFORE COFFEE, I tried to do the math on how many days until my stated retirement.  My fuzzy pre-caffeinated brain came up with around 415.

Ok then.

Now what.

My plan , at this moment, is to eventually retire out to the house in 29 Palms.  It is NOT our dream destination, but it is a slower pace and I think we can make it work ok.  We really need to win the lotto so I can live near a river or a lake or something.  No  whatever dam that is in the Monument ( I still call Joshua Tree "the Monument") does not count.

What am I going to DO with myself?

I keep hoping some hidden talent will emerge and I will suddenly have something to do that will keep me occupied and maybe make a little spare change on the side, but I seriously doubt I am suddenly going to become Grandma Moses or anything like that.

Writing is a hobby and no one- or very few people- seem to read this blog ( based on the numbers they give me and the fact that almost NO ONE comments)  I never was much of a short story writer.  Maybe  I can take a class or something.

Sigh.

I am looking at the future with equal amounts of hope and dread, which is all we can really do these days.   I just want to make it to 2020, when change is truly possible and the future may become clearer.

Here's to March 15, 2021.  Beware the Ides of March!

For Greg

When you placed
the gun against your head
and tried
to blow away the demon
you thought was lurking there
you missed

You didn't kill the pain
You broke it into
an extraordinary number of pieces
that flew
into the hearts
and the souls
of those who loved you

It's not the part of you
we need inside us

We needed  part of your warmth
your zeal
your humor
your grace

Instead
along with memories of better days
and longing to have
just one more talk
one more meal
one more
day
We have your pain

We will carry that inside us
it will rise to the surface
When we remember your laughter,
When we reconsider your words
When we speak your name