Pandemic thoughts

 LAPL ( where I work) has a  collection growing of things associated with the pandemic, a history file for future generations and possibly  historians who might want to see what people were thinking at the time.  I Want to contribute something, so over the next day or so, I will try to jot down what life is like, for one person, living in Los Angeles.

We first heard about the virus in February, I guess.  45 ( please note, gentle reader that I will not refer to the person in charge, one Donald John Trump, by any honorific.  45 will have to do)  there was a  cruise ship loaded with sick people and he WOULD NOT LET THEM OFF THE SHIP.  There is a news clip somewhere, where he says he "likes his numbers where they are" as if people suffering could be reduced to a number on a page.  This should have been a warning an an indicator or what was to come from his administration, but we were so used to outrageous  statements, it kind of flew under the radar.  HE said it would disappear.

It didn't.  It got worse.

Somewhere in the beginning of March, we started hearing that things would need to shut down, so that we would not spread the virus.  There was no vaccine and it spread quickly and a lot of people were dying.  We watched as people became ill and died for lack of equipment.  We heard pleas from New York and  Governor Cuomo for help for the Federal Government, but none came.  The way is seemed to play out was 45 was withholding aid because the majority of the people of New York did not vote for him ( that's how I see it and since I think 45 is a petty little man, you won't convince me otherwise.)

Our City leaders took action and closed things up.  I thought- silly me- that we would quarantine for three weeks and get it under control.  Sadly, the leadership of this country was not on board with any shut down, because, you know, he's a Business man  and a Science Denier.  So his followers refused to participate.  They refused to close, they refused to mask and they believed him when it said it was just another flu.

And people died.

I left my workplace around March 18, with the tools and equipment to work form home.  I am lucky, my type of work can be done anywhere with a computer and a telephone.  The I-pad  I was assigned turned out not to work so well and I invested in a laptop to supplement my desk top.

There was a run on the grocery store.  People panicked.  They hoarded, of all things, toilet paper.  It was, to use one of my Dad's expressions as scarce as hen's teeth. No idea why.  Hand sanitizer was also gone. Opportunists came out of the woodwork. There was this guy who took his kid's college fund and bought ALL the hand sanitizer he could find then tried to sell it online for super inflated prices.  There is actually a law against that in some states and they shut him down.  He was whining and crying on social media.  I don't feel sorry for him.  He tried to profit from someone else's misery and deprived others in his greed. Some people.(Can you hear me shaking my head?)  I must admit I bought more coffee than I normally would have, because I am not a nice person when not properly caffeinated. 

Meat was scarce too for a bit and I was in my freezer and my pantry like I was on an episode of "Chopped" ( a television show where chefs are given a basket of sometimes whacky ingredients from which they must make a gourmet meal or they are "Chopped' from the competition )  Some of the things I created are now part of my recipe base, so something good came from it.

I grabbed a bunch of books to read, thinking I would have time now that I was going to be working at home and there would be no commute.  I was wrong.  Not only did I work harder from home, the stress took away my ability to focus on anything that required prolonged concentration.  Other readers say the same thing.  I started listening to books when I could and that helped a bit.  I actually MISS my commute.  Follow the bouncing ball of my logic here.  I would drive in to work, about an hour in the morning.  I would listen to music or a book and organize my thoughts for work for the day.  At work, it would be whatever work was- sometimes super busy, sometimes just getting stuff done. Then I would drive home.  I would shed the workday on my way home and when I GOT home, it was about family or friends- anything but work.  Now I come downstairs, make coffee and I am in my office. It is here 24/7.  I don't have the luxury of a spare room that can be an office.  So I don't get the "break" between work and home.   I miss my office, I miss Central Library, where I work, I miss my "Annoying"( JUST KIDDING) co-workers.  I HATE Zoom meetings.  I feel like I am in a bad sitcom It always reminds me of the Brady Bunch opening when the tiles with the faces of people swap around as they pop into the room.

In an effort to keep my writing chops up, I tried and FAILED to keep my blog going.  Some days I just got sucked into mindless games on social media.  I did sign up to review books and that has lead me to find some good authors whose books I might not otherwise have found.

As of this moment, the adults are back in charge of the government, and I am hopeful for the rollout of vaccines.  There are still anti vaxers and anti maskers and people who think the whole thing is a hoax perpetrated by the Democratic Party to make 45 look bad.  Honey, he didn't NEED any help in that department.    If he had listened to the scientists instead of making this a political game where he got even with his enemies he MIGHT have been elected to a second term. But I digress into politics far too often, it is something I have always done.  I will say that people in this country voted in record numbers in this election and the next generation turned out in droves, so I have hope.

People are stating to get the vaccine and we are slowly moving toward a "new normal" whatever that is.  But for now, I miss dinners with friends in my home, HUGGING people and going.. anywhere.  Being "careful" means none of the things that gave me such joy are not possible right now.  I wait for the vaccine and for the virus to die off.

I live in hope.

Songs in your head

I want to move away from ALWAYS thinking about politics.  Now that I don't wake up and check Associated Press to see if  we are in a war started over toast or something, I want to talk about   oh.. books and poetry.  

I bought copies of Mary Oliver.  I intend to WRITE in the margins of said books, if I can get past my fear of doing so.  In college it took me a FULL semester to use the highlighter pen.  Working in a library has done that.

I woke up this morning with the Doors " Summer's almost gone" in my head.  I love Jim Morrison and the album "waiting for the Sun" is my favorite of theirs.   This is an obscure cut from the album  Which features "Love Street"  "The Unknown Soldier" and "Hello I love you"  Say what you will, Morrison was in fine voice for this album and this particular song, he manages sensual and wistful in the same moment.   The song is somewhat sad;   "When Summer's gone, where will we be?"

It's a question I often ask myself- Where will we be this time next year.  They question is reserved for birthdays, or opening a 500 pack of coffee filters ( Makes me think "I have measures out my life with coffee spoons")  Where will we be?

Since I have stopped fearing the daily annihilation that was the past Administration, I remain hopeful.  The little earworm visit from James Douglas Morrison  this morning, takes me back to my twelve year old self, listening to the music brought home by my neighbor who worked for an underground radio station and falling a bit in love with a voice and an idea.  Morrison would be dead by the Summer of 1971- although there is a theory that He and Janis and Jimi are all on some island somewhere.- and we would lose our youthful exuberance far too soon.  The last lines particualrly resonate, on thei cold rainy morning in January, so far away from those heady warm Summers:

Summer's almost gone

We had some good times

but they're gone

The Winter's coming on

Summer's almost gone.

Where will we be?

I posted part of this rant online

 I am so angry I can't see straight. I started what I THOUGHT was a fun bet with a Republican regarding the outcome of the election. He essentially lost the bet, although he clings to the Q-Anon fantasy of Joe Biden being arrested for treason on Tuesday and his God, Trump Riding to his inauguration on a white horse. Ok fine. as my mother used to say "dreams are cheap" HOWEVER this Republican went so far as to post an article that calls for the public execution of Barrack Obama and Joe Biden on a chat folder about a band we are both fans of. I wrote the Admin, complaining and I hope something will be done about it. it is ONE thing to have a difference of opinion and joke about it. it is QUITE another to call for the public murder of two people who have not been accused of a crime ( unlike HIS candidate, but I digress)

I dislike the Orange Menace to my soul, but I do not call for his death. BTW this guys throws his "faith" in my face all the time, Throwing the term "true Believer" around at the rest of us heathens

This guy I bet with says thing like God is waiting to show his wrath on Inauguration Day , and had a really crackpot theory that trump and the Supreme Court passed a "secret law" about voter fraud. It would be funny if it were not for the fact that there are people out there who truly believe this stuff.

Look, I thought the 2016 Election was rigged in trump's favor and the Republican Caucaus and the Mueller Report bears that out- and YEAH I never called trump 'president" petty of me I know but it made me feel better. I never:

1- advocated the overthrow of the government

2- called for his public execution ( Or sure I wanted him arrested and I think he slunk out of DC so as not to leave the White House in cuffs at 12:02 today)

Honestly, this same guy I made the bet with did all of that and more. He was personally wetting himself over the thought that Biden would be charged with treason and trump could be installed as president. Nope, here's how it would play out. IF there were an issue installing a president today the Speaker of the HOUSE becomes President. That would be.... NANCY PELOSI. Oh Conservative heads would explode. Same guy said that last week the Supreme Court would rule in favor of trump 5-4 and he would be returned to the presidency. This guy keeps deleting his posts as the date for the Big Reveal promised by his ministers passed with no payoff. he bet a lot of people a lot of money. I think he will be hard to find in the coming days.

I celebrate a return to sanity. Church bells rang all over Europe when the election was announced. We need to get control and move our country forward. Joe and Kamala - and ALL of us- have a job to do

Hello Joe, waddaya know?

 

Posted elsewhere but sharing here as well.

I am awake. I am making coffee and looking at the news feeds, as sanity returns. No more tweets about "crowd sized" and midnight musings from the golden toilet, although THAT stopped right after the failed Coup attempt. I had to laugh when I saw that Trump is trying to lay the groundwork for taking credit for any good Joe does. typical of someone who claimed that if he won the election was "perfect" and if he lost. it was fraud. I HAVE to ask, since the conspiracy of the "stolen election" will not die, as it should WHY couldn't any of the 70 Million Republicans in the country FIND any evidence? The Texas LT Governor stood ready with his million dollars to pay for such evidence and yet, the ONLY thing that came to light was a Trump voter or two trying to cast dead relatives' ballots.

But I digress. today is a celebration, and while I cannot have the glass of champagne I had hoped to have this morning- I will be working and watching this historic event unfold- I will be celebrating; a woman VP, a logical man in the White House, a cabinet made up NOT of political backers and people he owed favors to, but real people who KNOW something about the agency they will lead. I look forward to the reversal of many of trump's environmental and human rights policies being reversed in the first 100 days.

We have a long way to go. I guess the best thing about trump is that he revealed just how much racism is there and what it is capable of. I am not naïve enough to think it was gone, but trump and his ilk showed it's human face, made them comfortable enough to be parading down Main Street and giving interviews on the local news.

I read NPR refused to cover his "remarks" as he left the white house to a puny crowd, as they did not have time to fact-check them.

The Liar- in Chief is gone. May we never see his angry orange face again.

Let's call it what it is

 On Wednesday, failed Presidential candidate  (AND IMHO  FAILED PRESIDENT ) Donald John Trump attempted a coup.  He has been sowing the seeds of mistrust and anger, even when he and his party WERE the ruling body, for YEARS.  Look back at his 2016 campaign.  He kept talking about  "illegals voting" or "Dead people voting"  He was planting the seeds, even as he won that election.

When he "won" in 2016,(and the Mueller report does say he had outside interference to help him achieve that lofty goal) did the Democrats Storm the Capitol, take him to court, go on Social media to encourage violence.  No. They got to work.  They started reaching out to groups who never voted before and groups that stopped voting.  They got the message out.  Personally, I became much more politically active and active in my community .  I  donated more to local food banks and Planned Parenthood.  I sent money to politicians whose message I felt was important.  I talked to people about voting.  Many times, I simply encouraged people to be part of the process.  You cannot complain if you don't make your choices known.

The riots and unrest that came over the summer, due to the problems with police brutality and the murders of Breonna Taylor and George Floyd are related to the general governance of this country and are beginning a dialog between rational people on both sides of the aisle, but some people see change as an assault on their way of life and are unwilling to talk about ANY sort of change in the way we approach issues of race in this country.  This is a topic that needs more than a paragraph or a page and I will be talking about that at some future date.

On Wednesday, I was dismayed. There has to be a stronger word;  pissed off maybe, but even that fails to adequately convey my emotions.  I could not believe and simultaneously COULD believe that people were trying to stop the counting, a largely ceremonial act, to be honest, as the actual VOTES had been  shown live on national television, but no matter.  Team Trump's motto seems to be "Who ya gonna believe?  ME or your LYING eyes?"  Trump whipped these people into a final frenzy, promised them HE would march with them, then went home to this cushy quarters in the Nation's House and ( reportedly) gleefully watched the scene unfold.

He sent them to capture or kill the people in Congress and The Vice President for not doing his bidding.

Let that sink in.  There were people armed with zip-tie cuffs.  Did you think they ere there to make sure the statues and the precious artwork in the Halls went undisturbed?  They were screaming "Hang Mike Pence"  Trump has placed in their tiny brains that anyone who does not follow him is a traitor and needs to be killed.

There were more people killed in this insurrection attempt than at Benghazi.  So we can ask the same questions.  Why was the Capitol left undefended?  When they called for  help , why was none sent for several hours?  Who is responsible for the deaths?   Who will answer for the murder of  Capitol policeman Brian Sicknick?  

Ironic, no?

Those who perpetrated this attack on democracy are taking to social media to deny that they did anything wrong.  I think they believed they were right in trying to overthrow the government and to kill whoever got in their way. Please don't try to say it was anything less than that.  Trump's lawyers have never presented the "Massive voter Fraud"  he crows about.  There isn't any.  Even his own people, his OWN Departments who oversee such things says there wasn't anything.  Q-Anon people will claim that that is because all of those people were seduced by Deep State( whatever THAT is) and cannot be trusted.  Q-anon and Q-anon alone knows the truth.

I am trying to remain hopeful. Trump and his henchmen must NOT be let off easily.  History reminds us that they let Hitler off easily and twelve years later he was trying to destroy the planet.  Trump MUST face the consequences of this action.  He is going to say "Oh, I had nothing to do with it. I tried to stop them"  He is insane and must be removed.

For those who are posting that "Conservative voices are being silenced" I say this.  THIS is not conservative doctrine.  This is NOT less government and fiscal responsibility.  This is the fascism they warned you about wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross. 

Hell's Kitchen as a metaphor

 My husband and I have been "binge watching" Hell's Kitchen ( well not really binge watching, we watch one episode a night because it is limited and I want to stretch it out)   we are currently on Season 8, I think.  Last night I started to think about HK as a microcosm and what it all meant.

Before you roast me, YES   I know it's a reality show and the film is cut to make me think a certain way about the contestants, some of them appear to be straight out of Central Casting.

Sixteen  lucky "kitchen workers" are chosen to compete, most of them are some kind of cook.  Now before you start on me for THAT, please understand that my father was a sort order cook.  There is a BIG difference- and HE taught me that- between a cook and a chef.  None of the people in HK have earned the title of Chef, yet.  They  begin by showing Chef Ramsay their skill set.  Some people's dish is worse than what I make ( my food is good, my "plating" is hideous, but I am just trying to get it on the table)  I try to guess who will be the first one out the door, based on food and demeanor.  I am usually wrong.

Over the past few seasons, Chef Ramsay is less and less an asshole, less F-bombs are dropped.  He does order contestants out or to the pantry for a chat, I think based on his assessment of their skill and for dramatic effect. Let's face it, watching a kitchen show without some kind of manufactured drama would be as dull as the dishwater in the back of the house. ( Even I have drama in the kitchen, but I blame my possessed oven- and before you say it, yeah, it's a poor worker who blames his tools, but my oven LIES to me about the temperature- it belongs to the apartment, and I was going to see about a replacement, but they just sold the building and it's probably NOT a great idea to start OFF being branded a complainer.  We will be moving, hopefully within the next year. 

The thing about HK is that somewhere along the line in each season, the contestants forget that the prize is running a kitchen for an outrageous salary.  They remember the salary and forget that running a kitchen is what you are there to show you can do.  You need to be able to LEAD a brigade.  I don't care how awesome you are in the kitchen, if you stand at the pass SCREAMING you are not going to keep staff.  I have a thing about yelling at people.  I will NOT yell at you, unless you are on fire ( or some other danger)  People who scream at you constantly do not achieve the desired goal.  They lose your respect and I for one am less likely to approach a boss who screams at me like I am incapable of simple tasks.  I have been known to push back, but after a certain point, I just give up. In HK, being able to guide a team is the skillset they all forget.  In season 7, this was dramatically illustrated in the last service. Nona took Boris in hand and gently but firmly explained what he was doing wrong and how to correct it.  Russell stood at the pass, screaming invectives.  When Nona won ( and rightly so, Chris and I high-fived like we had something to do with it) Russell bitched about how his team "lost it for him"  No Boo-boo( as my daughter says) that's on you. You may be the best cook since the invention of fire, but if you can't guide people and keep their respect, you might as well go back to making mud pies in the back yard.

When I watch HK, I realize a few things.  Working in the kitchen can be a metaphor for life in general.  Learn your strengths, work on your skills, lean on  and learn from others and above all remember that your product is not just you doing the work.  My dad was right about getting into what he called "the cooking game",  it's not for everyone. It's harder than it looks, like most things that are done by people who know what they are doing and make it look easy.  I take away from each episode that there are people out there who will do anything to get ahead, but when you are working with others, it is far easier to be kind and learn something from them.  You might learn something about yourself in the process.

Georgia on My mind

 ok the title was lame, but all eyes , hearts and minds turn to Georgia today.  Hopeful for the change that needs to happen.   

I see the Orange moron was down there, spouting nonsense.  I was heartened to read that as he recited his "greatest hits' of catch phrases, the crowd refused to join him in things about building the wall and Hilary's emails.  He is STILL threatened by her, FOUR YEARS LATER.  He has such a weak sphincter,   

Today, they vote in Georgia and it is my dearest hope that the Circus of Nonsense has unintended consequences, that Republicans  will disbelieve the process is legit and stay away  from voting in DROVES.  There was a whole movement to "write in Donald Trump"   ok  do that.  Works for me.  WHAT do they teach in schools down there anyway?  I guess it's nationwide that our people are not educated in the basic rules of government, even the so called "Constitutional Lawyers" like Ted Cruz who have an Ivy League education are either missing the point of- more likely- trying to pull the wool over the eyes of his uneducated followers into believing  that they are trying to get Trump back in office and that they support him.  Remember, this is NOT about who won in 2020, it's about the mid-terms in 2022 AND the Big Dance in 2024.

IF this movement were to succeed, then Congress, not the people would be the ones choosing the President from now on.  It won't matter that we vote, the matter will ALWAYS wind up before Congress.   

I'm fine with throwing out the Electoral College Vote.  Let's use the popular vote this time.  ( see what I did there?)

Trump tried to bully , flatter and cajole the Secretary of State in Georgia, a man who did the job the good people of Georgia elected him to do, and choose Country over party.  Refreshing.  the fact that he recorded it, then when Trump tweeted smack about him, RELEASED it to the media is a BALLER move. I see that some Trump acolytes are claiming that  it is not what it sounds like but you can LISTEN to him as well as read his words.  Black is white and up is down with some people as long as it serves their purpose.

Hope springs eternal and the vote in Georgia and what happens tomorrow in Congress are crucial.  Joe was right in saying we are in a battle for the soul of our nation.  I am looking for the soul, the conscience of the Republican Party.  I pray they find it in time 

Rabbit, Rabbit or New Beginnings

 There is a superstition that you say "Rabbit, Rabbit" upon opening your eyes on the first day of the month.   I have no idea why, and I can barely remember my name when I wake up in the morning, so remembering the DATE and uttering the lucky phrase very rarely happens .

Still, New Year's Day fills me with hope.  This year is different, so far ( I was gonna say "weird" but I am trying a new attitude)  No Rose Parade , no 8 am flyover of the stealth- we live in the flight path and the thrill of the flyover is a real treat  for New Year's Day.  This year we MIGHT have been able to take a day to see the floats- something I did ONCE a long time ago, but by the time we all got there we had about 1/2 hour to see them before they kicked us all out.  They were interesting and one day I would love to be able to go and look at them.  I do understand it is a very popular event and the crush of people might prohibit it, but I remain hopeful for "someday"  I went so far as to do some volunteer work on the Burbank float a few years ago, prep work. They were such Nazi's and rude as the day is long. THEY had a snack table and water and such but NOTHING was provided to the volunteers and the teenage girl who took a sip of water to get the dust from the herb we were mincing out of her throat was THREATEND with No volunteer time being given to her.  It was not a fun experience.  I am not afraid of hard work, but there should be an element of fun or appreciation in the labor.  I did my commitment and NEVER went back.  I understand that they are on a tight deadline, but you can do it without making people hate you,

Every year, I try to imagine where I might be, a year from now.  2020 was a year of terrible disappointment and awful "surprises"  I have heard- and said- "If you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans"  But I can't help but plan.  I am not exactly a "go with the flow" kind of person.  My husband is and maybe I could learn to be, but I am 62 years old and have ALWAYS been this way, so change would be nigh on impossible without some kind of serious work on my part, reprogramming me.  I let go of the reins from time to time, still it is hard.

So, no New Year's Resolutions I won't keep anyway.   I am going to try to be the best me I can be, to help where I can, to love my friends and be more "present" in their lives if they wish even while we are forced to be distant.  I will remain hopeful and remain active in my community even if it's just to share information and contribute funds where I can to help those in need.  I will honor my commitments.

So "Rabbit, Rabbit" and Happy New Year.  To quote Sherman T. Potter in MASH,  "Here's to the New Year.  May it be a damn sight better than the old one"