Negtive thoughts and negative people

I woke up at three a.m. with an epiphany.  When negative thoughts and negative people are removed from a situation, it allows the "good" energy to flow and to heal. I work up after dreaming of a golden river of energy that was stalled in its progress by a large wooden peg.  When the peg was removed, the energy flowed down in great waves.  I realized what it meant.   I had been particularly angry, well maybe not angry- more like disappointed, in a colleague who had spent a lot of time and energy rearranging things on a project to suit HIS liking.  Then, when he got some "push back" from the group, he tucked his tail and took his ball and went home.  This project is crucial to the life of the organization and I could not understand how someone who said they were committed to it could just say "I'm out."  It leaves the rest of us scrambling.   But yesterday, after months of trying to solve a key piece, the gates opened and one particularly worrisome millstone has been removed.  The relief is genuine.  One hurdle in this race has been cleared.

The person who left made a remark that was something akin to  " I can't keep working with people who think everything is going to be ok"  Hmmmm.  Maybe HIS negative energy was the peg that was blocking the flow.  Maybe him leaving was the catalyst for change, for GOOD change, that we needed.  I can't imagine working on anything with anyone who did not believe in a successful outcome.  Why bother if you think it's going to fail?  Belief and faith are powerful tools.  I walk in faith and believe.  Some may think it's naive, but hope is a prime motivator for me.  Without hope, you have nothing.

I need to look at what might be blocking my success and remove the" blocking pegs" to the flow of the positive.  I know where I need to start.  With myself.  I need to forgive those who have hurt me and bless them in my heart.  I need to accept that there are things about others that will not change and remove the negative thought I have about them.  Let them be who they are but remove them from my life as much as it is possible to do.  Interaction with these people can be kept to a minimum and when I am around them, I need to remember that what they do no longer matters to me.  I will be more hopeful for positive energy to come into their lives, but realize that what they do is their choice and what comes from their choice has nothing to do with me.

Civil Service thoughts

I have been an employee of the City of LA for 38.5 years.  yesterday, we got yet ANOTHER note from our HR Director, indicating the LA Times plans another "exposè" on our salaries. Apparently every year at Election Time, the Editors of local papers look to see what City folk are making.  After all, we are all grossly overpaid.  If I were writing about City "employees" I would be more concerned about elected officials who take campaign contributions from special interest groups, than some poor schlub who is asked to work overtime because the Department is "saving money" by not hiring enough employees to fill the gaps.  The theory that by not filling positions the Department saves money is just one more issue I have with the City's Business Plan. It is less about getting the best out of everyone and more about the Bottom Line.  Burn out a good worker?  No problem, there are more where they came from.  We don't encourage anyone to think outside the box if we are working them to death,  It is hard to streamline your workload when just keeping up is all you can do.  It's like the old "Lucy" show where she is working the line at a chocolate factory and once they think she has the hang of it, they speed it up- to the point where she just melts down. 

I was talking with someone about how I feel as a City employee.  I don't think I work for the City, but for the people of the City of LA.  I try my best.   Sure I am well paid, but you get a full days pay- and then some- out of me. I don't worry about it much, until some reporter decides we are all lazy bums, sucking on the public teat, so to speak.  What we do- all of us- for the City is vital and keeps it moving.  The move to privatize to "save money" will not work.  Ultimately, you will create a situation where there is more graft, as those remaining City Fathers who will dole out the contracts to businesses competing for the prize become "for sale".   Absolute power corrupts absolutely, doesn't it?

Books vs. "the Sound" radio

 Since my local radio station replaced the easy-going mellow DJ with one who laughs at his own lame jokes and whose "Humor" is akin to that "Triumph the Insult Dog"   I have given up listening to music on my morning commute.  "Uncle Joe" told interesting stories and joshed with the news guy.  Mark Thompson used to be half of Mark and Brian and I didn't like listening to him when he had to share the mike. I want music in the morning, not "hi-jinks"  His obsession with Elvis as being the 'Greatest entertainer who ever lived" is .. well.. sad.  I don't really like the evening drive time DJ's voice but she at least plays music.  I listen instead to books on tape.

I am taking this book challenge that suggests certain types of books to read.  I needed a 500 page book.  I picked "A discovery of Witches".  It was a twenty disc set and it was a trial to read.  I initially liked the book; about a historian studying in the Bodleian Library.  She's a witch from a powerful line who denies her magic.  She uncovers a mystery then meets a vampire.  They fall in love.  Somewhere in the middle of the book, it becomes "Twilight"  If I had to hear one more time about Matthew's charms, what he was wearing, how delicious his cold body felt, I was going to SCREAM.  I soldiered on through it, but don't think I will read the rest of the series.  It makes no sense.  Theoretically, they have traveled back to Elizabethan England to help Diana lean her craft and to escape from the beings in the present day who are trying to kill them.  Honestly, If I could time travel I don't think I would pick THAT time period to go back to.  One review I read stated bluntly that the heroine loses IQ points when she falls in love.  That's about right.  I think I would have liked a story more about Matthew's mother or the Bishop House, which is a living character with a mind of it's own.  Diana and Matthew and their sex life began to bother me.  They were ever-so-chaste.  How the heck DOES a vampire have sex anyway?  Don't you need blood-flow for that?  oh, yeah, the author had his heart beat once or twice an hour...  He's UNDEAD for chissakes!  Illogical, although the author wants us to believe that everything we humans ever heard about vampires is wrong and she is going to educate us in the correct history. Right.  I suppose if you can't work within the confines of accepted legend, you change the legend.  This book really challenged my "willing suspension of disbelief" inasmuch as some of it didn't even stick to the logic in this author's created universe.

I am currently listening to Ace Adkins version of the Spenser novels, a book called "Wonderland"  I don't much care for Joe Mantegna, but he was Robert B. Parker's pick for Spenser.  He apparently HATED  Robert Urich in the role.  This book qualifies for the "Book a TV show was based on", the  book series was the catalyst for "Spenser for Hire" , a show I loved until it got a bit preachy.  So I can check that one off the list as well. 

I have to read a Harold Robbins book for "A book your mother loved"   ugh. I don't know WHAT she saw in them, but she collected them.  I have a whole lot of those paperbacks that were part of her book collection.

I am trying to read, for my Book published the year I was born, Edna Ferber's Ice Palace.  I don't like it much and the language is very stilted.  I might chuck that one and try another bestseller from 1958.  I will give it another go and see if it gets any better, then I will go back to ht bestsellers of 1958 list to see if there is something I always wanted to read.  So far this book is not it.

Laura

I have had a friend on my mind lately.  Thirty-four years ago, although it seems like just yesterday, we buried our friend on Valentine's Day.  She had lupus.  It attacked her and before we knew it, she was gone.  I have been thinking about her this week.  We were friends at work and became friends outside work, although she was the outdoorsy hiking and skiing type, I was into music and bands and concerts.   She was the kindest person I ever met.  It's a cliche to say that someone's smile could light up a room, but hers did.  I am better for having known her.  I don't believe people become angels when they die.  I believe angels are a different being altogether, but I do believe that those who pass over can guide us in troubled times. I gave my daughter Laura's middle name as hers, Elizabeth, and I named the doll my grandmother gave Kate "Laura"  Kate called the doll "Lolly"  I do not know what happens when we cross over, but I know wherever she is, there is laughter and warmth and a wicked sense of humor.

Cindy Alexander and Stacey K. Black

Last night, I went out to see one of my favorite singer-songwriters, Cindy Alexander.  She was doing her Valentines Day/Singles Awareness Day show at Molly Malone's.  I bought tickets because I have missed seeing her the last few times for one reason or another and thought it might be a nice way to spend the night, since the "Sweethearts Dinner" at the MAC fell through.

I don't like Molly Malone's much.  I have had one or two unpleasant experiences with staff there, but this time it was nicer somehow.  We found street parking, a small miracle in itself, which was an easy walk to the club.  The doorman joshed with us a bit and we found two seats at the bar while we waited for the venue to open.  They had Bushmills'; after all it IS an Irish pub.  I had one at the bar and grabbed a refill on my way into the showroom.  I have been on edge lately and the elixir really made me feel mellow!

The place was already packed and we snagged two chairs near the sound-booth. The seats were placed directly beneath a HARD blowing AC unit but we figured it would be better when the place filled up.  The unit was blowing right in my face, so if you saw me and thought I was crying at all the sweet love songs, I was not.  Midway through Cindy's set, Chris changed seats with me and proceeded to freeze HIS butt off.  But as usual, I digress from the purpose of this which was to review the show.

I had never heard of Stacey K. Black, but was instantly charmed by her when she announced she had taken the gig so she could get a free ticket to see Cindy. She began with some lovely songs, then moved on to play a song entitled "Please go"  a "love song" with a wicked twist.  Delightful and well executed.  I am a fan.  I wanted to buy a CD.  I managed to scrounge up ten bucks cash, but she never made it back to the merch table. Ah  well, I can go to CD baby and see what is there.

I have been a fan of Cindy Alexander for almost ten years, I guess.  She is one of my favorite America finds, having opened for the "boys" years ago.   She came out on stage and both my husband and I gasped in appreciation.  Now, Cindy is always beautiful, but the dress she was wearing and everything else about her was so incredibly lovely that it bears mentioning.  She launched into "We'll See Stars" then was joined by her band.  She did a lot of older songs that I love and she and her band sounded wonderful.. My least favorite song of hers is "Soul Quake" which she played.  A lot of people like it, but it sounds too much like that Pointer Sisters song about wanting a lover with a slow hand. I don't like that song either.  I loved hearing "Time Falling Down" and one of my personal favorites "Angels and Demons" which showcases Cindy's amazing pipes.   She and the band were having a fun playful time, very relaxed and lighthearted mood which flowed out into the happy capacity crowd.

It was a wonderful evening and I am glad we went.  There is no easy way to get to the Fairfax District, where Molly Malone's is situated, from the Valley and the GPS took us on a long meandering trek through side-streets to get there.  On the way home I was the GPS and we got home quicker.

Annoyed....

I went to my eye doctor this morning. He said something about me being a librarian.  I gently corrected him, informing him that I did not have as Masters in Library science. I told him that was a requirement to call yourself a librarian.  He said "It's close enough"  I wanted to explode.  I wondered how HE would feel if I suddenly declared myself to be an Optometrist because I had worked in his office.  Dumb.  I don't think he got it that Librarian is a professional degree, just like Doctor is.  Maybe because it's a field that is traditionally thought to be a woman's profession, that it is somehow less noble.  It irks me.  At one point I actually wanted to BE a librarian, but my life took a different path and here I am.  Most of the time, I LIKE what I do and think it's an important cog in the Big ol' Wheel of the Library Department, but NEVER do I think for one moment that I should usurp the title that those who actually ARE Librarians carry.  I'm a Management Analyst. I have a Bachelor's Degree. I have a t-shirt that declares " I am a Management Analyst.  I solve problems you didn't know you had in ways you cannot understand."   Yep.  That about covers my job.

I didn't watch the Grammys. I was just interested in one category anyway.  My long time friend Jimmy Velarde produced an album that was up for Best Regional Mexican Music album of the year.  It didn't win, but the woman,Ixya Herrera, has a wonderful voice and a brilliant future ahead of her.  This from someone who can take or leave traditional Mexican music.  I liked what I heard here.

What bugged me about the Grammy's were a few things:

Kanye Kardashian.  Yeah I went there.  He is less relevant and I don't care that he recorded with Sir Paul He's a moron.  Who died and made him King of the Hop?    What does HIS opinion matter? Aren't the awards voted on by Members of the Academy?   Someone needs to uninvite him to the next shindig.  I could not help but wonder if the whole thing was a publicity stunt for his bride's "reality" show. Probably.  Sit your ass down and shut the hell up.  Even Beyonce  and Jay-Z were mortified.

On what planet was Rhianna's dress one of the best?  It reminded me of a giant Hostess sno-ball!

 Madonna's outfit was cute from the front, but geez the BACK?  No one wants to see that, Madge.

 I wonder about the Fashion editors, desperately looking for edgy outfits to praise.  Some people looked cute and classy, then there were those that just wanted to stand out in any way possible.  I'm getting to old for this shit....

Anti-vaxers and oven problems

The anti-VAX movement is driving me crazy.  It started to REALLY be an issue when a faked study was released that vaccines were the cause of autism.  The study was proved to be faulty, but like any good scary rumor, this one had legs of it's own.  Jenny McCarthy, who is most famous I believe for her Playboy spread NOT her Nobel Prize in science, was the one banging the drum on talk-shows and in magazines.  People believed it, anything to get an answer to the cause and possible elimination of autism.  But the study was a lie that people believe.  Here's the deal IMHO.  YOU have the right to choose not to vaccinate YOUR child, but you do NOT have the right to endanger MINE if you so choose.  I was out in public recently with my four month old grandson.  He's too young to have had all of his vaccines.  I worried that he might be exposed to something, although there are currently no warnings about measles in Los Angeles County.  There ARE in San Bernardino County, where he lives.  Just because YOU believe that herbs and a "healthy" lifestyle will prevent sickness, the resurgence of "childhood illnesses", as they used to call mumps and measles, is on the upswing.  It shows the flaw in the logic.  There are more reported measles cases every day, cases that COULD have been prevented with vaccines.  I wish no child the illness that COULD have been prevented.  It's irresponsible in my book.  I have a dear friend whose daughter is also a dear friend but she is rabidly anti-VAX.  She's a good mother, but she is wrong.  I pray for the innocent children who will be the ones who pay the price for this movement.

"You yelled HEY when the stove blew up. Upset?  Why Yes!"  That the line from a Lowell George song that I was singing last night.  I got the Baby Jesus in the sweetbread on Three Kings Day and we are having the celebration this morning.  I baked some lovely cinnamon apple muffins, but they burbled over and the whole kitchen was filled with smoke.  YIKES!  I had a meeting to go to and just turned off the oven and left the half baked treats in the oven with the door closed.  When I came home two hours later to try to deal with the mess, I found much to my relief that the muffins were NOT destroyed, but they actually came out ok!  We ate a few last night, just to be sure.  Of course, I have a meeting with a vendor this morning and will miss the party.  Sigh.  I wonder if I have discovered a new baking trick,  I don't think I want to repeat the experiment.

Punxatawny Phil and Superbowl thoughts

Happy Groundhog Day!  Well in Chicago, I don't think  ANY groundhog is coming to the surface.  I have been watching the posts from my friends who are trapped in Chicago- WHY they always do Mid-winter ALA in CHICAGO instead of Los Angeles is BEYOND ME!  BRRRRR.  I hope my friends are ok and will be able to get out soon.  There were over 1,000 flights canceled due to the storm.  I wonder how much this storm has to do with climate change and how much it is cyclical.  Probably a bit of both. I am anticipating a wet February, so we will see what happens.  Wet months are busy for me at work as we find all sorts of building issues are uncovered by a heavy rainstorm.

Where did the weekend go?  I was busy-busy, that's for sure.  The LA Marathon is gearing up again and I have a week to get my team in place before they open it up to the public.  I only really need about 15 dedicated workers to do our part of the event, I've done it with less.  It CANNOT rain on Marathon Day.  I am putting that out there now.  The Year of the Monsoon  can never be repeated.  If it DOES, I hope to be properly prepared.  Last time there was a spot the size of a quarter on my hip that was not wet. I have no idea why. The only bonus is that people on the east coast got to see that it DOES rain here, although the audience for a Marathon is not the same as, oh say, the Rose Parade.  Every year I hope for a cold wet January 1, so that people will see that it DOES rain in Southern California!  But for this year's Marathon , on the Ides of March,   I just want a nice cool but sunny day.  We are on the bluffs above Santa Monica and it is nice, but it does get cold.

I watched part of the Superbowl yesterday. It really came down to that one bad play, didn't it?  It was a good game, no matter who you were rooting for.  I really hate those games that are such blowouts that they are putting in everyone but the ball-boy and no one seems to care.  One year, I actually found myself feeling sorry for John Elway.  I do not like his arrogance.  There is a thin line between confidence and arrogance and he crosses it; but one year the Denver Broncos were getting beaten SO badly I actually rooted for him to make a completion.  I like football and appreciate the nuances of the game. The Patriots did not so much as win yesterday's game as Seattle lost it.  I know people will be crowing about the game and decrying the Seahawks, but they played a great game up until the very last minute.

I need to look at the commercials.  I saw a few of them that were posted online and will go back and look at them to see if there is anything wonderful.  It's sad when you look forward to Commercials, I suppose.  These days they are all so  "politically correct" and Über-sensitive.  I wondered about the commercial that used "This Land is your Land" a celebration of the uniqueness of the American Landscape, that was being used to showcase other countries.  Maybe it was meant as a unifying force and to try to get people to think about other counties in the same light we look at our own, but I was slightly annoyed by it.  Maybe I need to watch it again with a more open mind.  I tuned in at about half time.  I was less than impressed with Katy Perry.  Was Lenny Kravitz a "throw-away"?  He was onstage for what.. thirty seconds?  He and she struck the same pose she used to do with her former guitar player-music director, Matt Beckley.  Matt did it better.  I miss Matt. I should look and see what he is up to these days.  He's a good lad and a fine musician.   Katy was lip-syncing badly. She is being lambasted for her outfits, but I have seen some of her act and THESE were tame.  Ugly, but tame.  I loved how the net immediately found comparisons to her outfits and posted a "who wore it better" style meme.  Yes, She did look like she mugged a Hot Dog on a Stick employee for that dress she wore.  Just WHAT was she wearing when she danced with Missy Elliot? A SACK?  I expected it to come flying off, revealing some form fitting outfit underneath.  Missy looked good. 

I need to find Idina Menzel's National Anthem.  That song, no matter HOW you sing it, is going to piss someone off.  The thing I try to remember is that the tune is based on an English drinking song.  You need spectacular pipes to pull it off; or your audience needs to be highly lubricated which I believe the Superbowl audience may be, although not at the start of the game.  There was booing going on and people said that that was due to what was being displayed on the screen. I don't know about the Superbowl, where every minute is paid for by someone, but at sporting event I have been to NOTHING but the anthem happens during that time.  No food sales, no local advertisers, NOTHING,  How disrespectful is it to not take the time to honor America, as they say at Dodger stadium.  For the record, I always sing along.