Marriage is what brings us here today

I am attending the wedding of two dear friends this weekend and it got me thinking about how thing have changed in regard to the "institution" of marriage. It has changed from "when a man shall leave his mother and a woman leave her home"  People are getting married later in life.  It used to be, if you didn't have a boyfriend  in high school and weren't married by 22 you were an old maid.  I am glad THAT has changed!  Women are now free to pursue degrees and careers.  To be happy with who they are and not define themselves by the man in their lives.

Still, I am thinking of what "pearls of wisdom" I might impart to my soon-to-be-wed friends.  I suppose the most important is to never forget why you fell in love in the first place. The second is that the only constant is change and we will grow and change, but try to grow in the same direction so you are not so far apart.  Have goals and dreams together for your combined happiness.  The time for thinking only of yourself has passed.


They always say "don't go to bed angry"  well sometimes you should!  Sometimes a good night's sleep is what you both need to put things in perspective.  Sometimes, in my first marriage, I was too tired to keep arguing about things and if I could just go to sleep, I would have been calmer in the morning.

There is no "one size fits all" pattern for a happy marriage, but love and trust are the solid rock on which to build one.  Once either of those are gone, nothing else matters.  Love will change and become less the "butterflies in the stomach" ( although my husband can look at me and make my heart skip a beat) love becomes a warmth that you feel daily in a much softer way.

So Max and Christine, as you prepare to start this phase of your journey together, with your friends and family around you, I wish you love and laughter all the days of your lives.