Marriage Equality

In the midst of all the joyous posts, celebrating love over hate and making all of our citizens equal in regard to marriage, I was disturbed by a few mean spirited posts.   I was dismayed by a few friends whose fear of  gays has caused them to cling to the idea that this undermines THEIR marriage; or that now we will be able to marry our dogs.   I was also dismayed by a post by an openly gay comic I have encountered in my professional travels, decrying everyone posting rainbows.  He was complaining that all the people doing that didn't have the right to, as we were probably not gay and did not join in the fight.  OK.  Stick to your bitterness.  I guess you have been fighting so long, now that this battle is over, you are looking to start another fight because you don't know what to do with yourself?  We may not all have been protesting in the streets, but support for this has crossed all boundaries.  Let us ALL celebrate what this means for the Gay community. 

To those people saying that now churches will be forced to perform gay marriages, I ask that they read the law.  I did not see that the Catholic church was forced to perform marriages between divorced parishioners, as it was against their canon.  If you want to remain closed minded, then do so.  I certainly would not want someone like you to ruin MY beautiful day, when I marry.  The same goes for anyone who would not provide goods or services.  I vote with my feet AND I let people know about it, so people can make an informed decision about patronizing these establishments.  It's a free market and customers are allowed to choose just as owners reserve the right to refuse service.  Ultimately, money talks.

I am proud of my country today, as we move forward and make equality the law of the land.  Is the battle over?  Not by a long shot.  You cannot legislate emotions and it will take a long time before gay marriage is universally accepted.  Heck, some people still think interracial marriage is wrong.  But let us put all that aside today as we celebrate the landmark ruling of the Supreme Court.  LOVE WINS!

Politics. Politics, Politics....

Wow.  The Republican Party Clown Car is certainly filling up!   With Jeb Bush and The Donald tossing their caps into the ring, it certainly is a comedian's dream.  The Donald is an idiot, as his speech showed; what the heck does "bigly" mean?  The man needs better writers.  You would think with all that money, he could hire someone to teach him proper English. His comments about Mexicans really showed that money does not buy class or brains.  As far as ol' Jebby, geez, even his MOTHER doesn't think he would do a good job.  Sure, Barbara shot off her mouth then backpedaled that it was because she thought he would inherit his father's and brother's enemies, but I have a sneaking suspicion that Barbara knows that son  #2 makes son  #1 look like Einstein.  It's going to be an interesting year and a half, but traditionally, those who toss their hat in early don't last the entire race and it's just smoke and mirrors for the real candidate to emerge.  Frankly, in viewing the prospects, I don't hold out much hope that the Republican candidate will be a person that I would feel ok with as President.  So far I am not seeing anyone emerge, it just looks like the clowns are running the circus again.  Some of these guys are downright scary with their views on women's health and marriage equality.  Hillary is the Democratic frontrunner, but she faces an uphill battle of misdirection and sleight of hand as the Republicans scream BENGHAZI BENGHAZI BENGHAZI at her.  They neglect to point out how many Embassies were attacked under Bush and how many people were killed in those attacks.  The whole email thing is another can of worms.  I am just looking for someone with integrity, who will lead this Country forward.  Some of the thing I am hearing about the agendas of the candidates scares me.  We need to focus on things like the economy and the environment, foreign policy and terrorism.  We need someone who can lead our country, male or female,of any ethnicity; that doesn't matter.  What we need is someone with brains.  Love him or hate him, no one can deny Barack Obama is a smart man.

You can probably tell that this post has been rambling around my draft folder for a bit.   I will post more on my thoughts on the historic Supreme Court decision later.

Cindy Alexander and Polly Baker at Molly Malone's

I am trying to figure out just how long I have been a fan of Cindy's.  It's got to be over ten years, because I remember having a conversation with her about trying to get out by myself, post divorce.  I wasn't dating Chris at the time. So, needless to say, I love her music, if I have been following her for that long.  She is one of my "America finds"; they have amazing openers, more often than not.

Cindy was playing at Molly Malone's in the Fairfax district.   I have a wary relationship with that place, as the ambiance can be hit or miss.  The place was packed and I needed to get a seat for me and for Chris. Recent health challenges for both of us preclude standing for long periods of time.  They were running late, we could hear them sound-checking through the walls, When we got in I plunked Chris down at a table for two near the sound booth.  A woman who had been in line with us told us we wouldn't be able to order food in the showroom, which I thought was crazy.  Let's see, if I order dinner, I will order a drink. No dinner?  I MIGHT get a soda.  Happily, she was wrong and I was able to get the fish and chips ( they were OUT of the corned beef!!!)  It was pretty good AND a Bushmill's to boot.  We chatted with fellow long time fans, Craig and Lynne.  Then it was showtime!

I wanted to like Polly Baker, really I did.  After all she was sweetly introduced by Cindy with warmth.  I just couldn't.  She's young and has a lot to learn, I suppose this is still very early in her career, but here's my advice.   Slow down.  Watch your phrasing, Breathy does not equal sexy if you sing the whole song like you can't catch air.  Write songs about something OTHER than that one guy who dumped you.  I know it works for Taylor Swift, but even SHE is becoming passè. AND after your set, do NOT meet at the back of the room with your posse making SO MUCH NOISE you drown out the act on stage.   I had to use The Glare to get them to shut up  I know the label will shepherd her and she does have some talent.  She just needs guidance.

Cindy's set included a mix of old songs that I love and newish songs, all of which I have heard before. The end of the set included a cover of Tom Petty's American Girl that had a country tinge to it.  It was great!  Cindy played two of my favorite songs, "Heaven knows" and "Idiot Child"  She asked the fan who requested "heaven knows"  what the song meant to her,  The fan shrugged and said she just liked it.  I thought about why I like the song,  I think it's the way the song works from despair to hopefulness; that if you keep the faith, all will be well in the end.  I could be missing the mark on what she meant, but I always think that what you hear is equally important, that the listener is allowed to internalize the meaning and apply it as they will to themselves.  As for "Idiot Child"  I love the power in Cindy's voice when she delivers the line "I just need someone who believes in me"  After all, I am the "idiot child" in my family!  Cindy looked and sounded beautiful as always.  My husband commented that he liked the tank and jeans look as you could really see her getting into the songs.  It was a wonderful set and it was over too soon.  I DID manage to snag a cookie that Cindy made.  Domestic Goddess!  Darn good cookie!

This is my "birthday week" and it was nice to start it out in such a fun way.

Medical stuff

So far, the first round of tests have come back negative, which is positive and I have something to deal with the symptoms, but what I really want is to find the CAUSE and deal with that. More fun tests await me. My doctor asked if I could RUN on a treadmill. AFTER I stopped laughing, I told her no. I thought about that meme that says "If you ever see me running, you'd better run too, because something BAD is chasing me."  I could walk on the treadmill, maybe. I am dealing with weird swelling in my lower legs.  The swelling is sudden and elevating my legs doesn't seem to help.  I am trying to get more exercise, really making an effort to get on the bike every day,  Medicine these days seems to be less about curing the disease and more about medicating it  to a point of tolerability.  When pharmaceutical manufacturing became a big business, the art of curing a disease became less the focus.  If we looked more toward rewarding those who worked toward curing, rather than managing the disease, I wonder how things would change in the medical world.

"It's ok to start writing, even if you don't have a clear picture of what you are going to write"  Boy truer words were never spoken.  I almost NEVER know exactly what I am going to write when I start on of these blogs.  Right now I am waiting for inspiration or coffee to kick in.

The Kardashian/Jenner Family has  been all over the news.  Aren't their 15 minutes up yet?   WHY are we subjected to these people on a daily basis, as if they matter?  I feel for Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner.  Transitioning has got to be a rough path, even in private, but Bruce is doing it in public, surrounded by the crazy train he calls his family.  Oh  sure his ex wives ( except for the last one) have come out in gentle support.  Kim, naturally, made it all about her in offering him makeup tips ( here, Bruce, you take this Spackle knife and....)     I wonder about the world when every single day the news has some tidbit of information regarding that family.  NOW the two Jenner daughters are trying to Trademark their names.  Seriously.  I wonder what type of ego you have to have in order to think that you can win a trademark on a common name.  Good.  Let no child be given their names and those names will die out with them.  Sheesh.  As if they are saving the world or something.  Just WHAT is it they all do anyway?  Other than be poster children for dysfunctionality , I am unclear.

How did it get to be June already?  The year is just flying by.  We were talking about time and how when you are a kid it just seems to drag on, but when you are an adult, we seem to go from January to December at an alarming rate of speed.  It's summer already, well almost but it's freaking HOT already and I still don't want to appear in public in a bathing suit.  Every year, I swear I am going to get myself in shape and every year I fail miserably.  I am working out on the treadmill and the exercise bike, but my knees are swelling ( water retention) and it hurts a bit.  I know more exercise can help with the water retention but it hurts to get moving.  ARGH  it's a vicious cycle.  Baby steps.  I didn't get this out of shape overnight and it's going to take work on my part to get healthy.  I am going to be moving slowly, but MOVING as I walk with my friends tomorrow in the Pride parade.  I need to try to find my sparkly cap....

Going up to the McGroarty Arts Center this evening to help with the catering at the Ceramics show.  It's a WONDERFUL show and I am looking forward to seeing  and BUYING some student art.  I did see a beautiful bowl, but I have nowhere to put it and would be afraid to use it; I am so klutzy I am sure I would break it and then be very sad about it.  I am sure to find some beautiful student art that will be exactly what I need!!  The event is open to the public and goes from 5-9.  I made some BEAUTIFUL chocolate dipped strawberries, so if you want some- COME EARLY!

Marriage Equality

Recently, I got in a "discussion" with a relative who heretofore I had considered to be a reasonable person..  He has begun posting horribly skewed "articles" about gays and their relationships.   His latest one has to do with some survey about twins and how their identical DNA PROVES that being gay is a choice.   STOP..  It made my head hurt with all the pretzel logic.  Some of these things in the article reminded me of that scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, where they try to determine if the woman is a witch.  The line of reasoning is correct, it's just that the answer they get is wrong.

So, follow the bouncing ball of MY logic.

If being gay is a choice, then so must being straight be a choice.  I want to know when all those straight people CHOSE the straight life, what their thought process was and how they worked to be straight.  The question I must also ask is this; "If being homosexual were the  societal norm, could you change how you feel?"  I can only speak for myself.  At one point in my life I DID question my sexuality.  It was during a time of great upheaval and I pondered the question.   I came to the conclusion that, no, I was definitely straight and the "problem" was not me but the person I was having the relationship with.  This was NOT me making a choice, but confirming what I knew to be true for me.

Some people say that gays being allowed to marry undermines marriage.  DIVORCE undermines marriage.  How does my neighbor's marriage impact me or my life?  That's right, it doesn't.  I know people who have been divorced two or three times.  Does this impact my marriage?  No.  So how does giving someone the legal right to wed, to extend to ALL citizens the same right, impact MY marriage, or even my life?  I am at a loss to explain it.

My question to people who are vehemently opposed to gay rights is this  "What are you afraid of?" I am tired of hearing the mistaken concept that gay people will molest children. Pedophilia is not homosexuality.  No one is trying to turn you or your children gay.  The concept is ludicrous. Being openly gay and leading a normal happy life should not be mutually exclusive.  No one should have to hide who they are if it harms no one.  Pedophiles ARE a completely different animal and are off the table in this discussion.

Back to the article about twins.  I wondered this morning if there are any studies about twins who are right-handed and left handed.  Back in the Middle Ages, left handed people were thought to be in league with the Devil and so children who showed a preference for being left handed were beaten and "retrained" to fit that societal norm of being right handed.  Did they choose to be left handed?  No, they just were.  They were born that way.

On Sunday, I will be joining my friends and co-workers from the Library in the Pride Parade.  I walk alongside my friends to show how far we have come and to acknowledge how much further we need to go.

Ireland and the Duggars- some thoughts

Is it ironic that Ireland voted to approve Marriage equality over the same period of time the Duggars nasty little secret has been exposed?   I find it sad.

My father's family came from Ireland.  I am always proud of the connection and happy that my great-grandfather chose to leave there ( under murky circumstances, I might add) and come to America.  I am pleasantly  surprised in some ways that a country whose major problems have been over religion would put aside those differences and do the right thing.  I want to believe MY county will follow suit.  Strange to think that Ireland, not America, is showing the world their compassion.  Our country is overrun by hate groups, posing as Christians.  Who would Jesus hate?  I am going to quote from the Bible   "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another."  What part of THAT isn't clear, or is up to interpretation?   Jesus doesn't say "Love people only if they agree with you".  He doesn't say HATE someone who is different. Nope.  Just wants us to love one another and in that way we show we are his followers.   It's pretty clear to me.  The "Christians" cite Leviticus but that book is so full of contradictions it isn't even funny. Whoever wrote that book had an overblown sense of authority. Accuse me of "cherry picking" but there are some things in there that just do not apply to our lives today.

I see the Duggars are trying to protect their failing empire by saying the girls forgave Josh for what he did to them. Now, that's as may be, but the disturbing, even criminal, part of this equation is that they did nothing to protect them from future abuse and HID the problem, all the while making grossly inaccurate accusations that equate homosexuality with pedophilia.  If Jim-Bob would "let" her, Michelle should go back to school.  She needs an education.  

Maybe she can learn where babies come from.

road trip and food

Long overdue reviews! We went on the road -again.   As usual, it's all about food for me,  so here goes;

We stopped at Andersen's for their famous pea soup.  I am not a big fan, but everyone says you have to try it. So I can cross that off my list.  It was just ok.  The BLT was weird,the "toasted bread" was cold  The potato salad was just .. icky.

The next morning we went to the Black Bear Diner in Hayward.  We each got something called the "Grizzly sampler" or something like that.  It was two eggs,  waffle or french toast an a slice of ham.  I got a waffle and Chris got french toast, but when the plate came, the "slice" was more like a "sliver"  we called the waitress over, and she brought him another similarly sized piece.

I am not a big fan of "Casino Food" and the stuff at Cache Creek lived down to my expectations.   Chris got a turkey burger that was so bad, he didn't eat it.  Now I have two rules about restaurant food;  One-  If it tastes bad, DON'T eat it. Years ago, my then-husband and I went to a local British food place, where the mulligatawny soup was SO salty I decided to pass on it.  He ate MY bowl and his.  He got food poisoning so bad he was hospitalized.  Hence the rule.  Two-  DON'T order anything else. I am leery of what the kitchen staff might do with a second order if I reject the first!

When we left Cache Creek, we wound up in Woodland and went to Perry's Cozy Diner.  Totally an old-style diner that reminded me of places I used to go as a kid (not the Faux retro places, but honest-to-goodness 60's decor)  I wasn't too hungry but got the broasted chicken.  Chris got a BIG salad.  The chicken was really good BUT the corn bread was nuclear-baked (microwaved) and the potatoes were straight out of a box.  UGH.  Good thing I wasn't too hungry!  We got Anna some fried zucchini, which she said was great. The server was terrific and we went back for breakfast the next morning, which was first-rate.  Friendly service, it's on the same property as the Best Western, which was REALLY nice.  We got a "deluxe room" which was large and comfortable.

I love it when the hotel has coffee IN the rooms and has free breakfast.  Both places we stayed had both and it makes life so much easier as I am NO GOOD TO ANYONE before I have my jolt of morning joe.  Breakfast fare at these places can be dicey, but I have learned to make "informed" choices and get a real meal later.  It's nice when they have cereal and bagels.  Both places had a "Make your own waffle" station  I didn't feel like standing there, as I was getting something for the three of us to take back to the room.

We went on to Thunder Valley and avoided the casino food.  We wound up for dinner at a local pizza joint called "Mary's Pizza shack"  I wasn't expecting much but WOW, the food was terrific!   We got a lot of food and the prices were reasonable. 

By the time we got to Black Oak, I was tired of casinos and we were a bit tapped out of the cash I had set aside to play with, so we went to the restaurant. We didn't go for the buffet and I am glad because they had really good burgers with tasty slaw on the side.  They had an apple pie that was wonderful.  The food was AMAZING.  I even treated myself to a drink which was pretty darn good too.  It was nice that Anna had a bit of luck at the casino and we left the place happy!

It was a nice trip and a nice visit.  I love traveling with Chris and Anna, they are always a lot of fun to be around; low-key companions.