Will Tuesday be good News day, or another paying dues day

I am NOT coping with being stuck in the apartment.  I thought I was doing ok but....

The chest pains are back in full force and no matter what I do about them- taking my doctor's advice- I can't seem to get them under control unless I go upstairs and lay down and since I am supposed to be working, that is not something I can do all the time.  I think I have my mother's Protestant work ethic weighing heavily on me.

Yesterday, Chris was trying to suggest something to help.  Poor Chris, I exploded on him when he suggested I try oil painting, which was something he did with his family and enjoyed.  I have NO TALENT whatsoever in the arts world   I know.  I have tried.  I just find it frustrating that I can't seem to make what is in my head appear on the  paper or the canvas.  I felt, and still feel, badly that I unloaded on him.  He's a good man and he was trying to help.

Sigh.


I just read an article in the New York Times that said STOP trying to be productive.  It outlines the reasons we THINK we have all this extra time and think we can do something with it.  We are beating ourselves up for not taking on a new hobby, learning a language, making home repairs, doing whatever it was we thought we could do with the"extra" time. The reality is  that in the "Extra" time we are coping with the new reality of our lives during the quarantine.  Sure, I have rearranged my pantry and am eyeing my spice rack, but anything else?  Nope.  I haven't even READ, which is my passion.  I have been watching bad TV but just how many episodes of Forensic Files and the First 48 are there?  ( I have already gone through all of the Say Yes to The Dress and  "Love it or List it")  I am watching baking shows and become addicted to the trashy "Married at First sight" which is part science experiment and part Maury Povich.  Tomorrow night is the final episode. I have my bets as to who stays together and who walks into Divorce Court.

I realized at some point that the "horrible commute" was my "down time", I listened to books or sang along with old music or talked to friends via my Bluetooth in my car.  That is gone now. I really think it helped me to decompress and switch gears either going into or coming home from work.  Funny to make that connection.

Someone suggested ( it's my neighbor who thinks everyone has a book in them) that I write a novel.  I don't DO characters, so my novel would be based on real stories and I would probably lose a few friends and wind up in court.  So I continue in this little blog, hoping people are reading it and it gives them a laugh ( either with me or at me) and something to think about.