August 29. Again

My mom once told me she was glad her mother did not die around a holiday.  She said she couldn't remember the exact date and it was easier not to have the date remind her of her loss.

I can't seem to do that.

My mother died on August 29, 2004 after a courageous battle with Alzheimer's  My brilliant, funny loving mother slipped away piece by piece for four years. The pain of that still causes my throat to close and the tears to burn my eyes. 

I miss her terribly.  That really goes without saying but since I am typing it, I am putting it out there.

I think of her when I am in the kitchen, having coffee in the morning.   I think of her when I try to balance my bank statements.  She pops into my mind at the oddest times.

Recently at work, there was a challenge to post your prom picture.  I posted one of me in the beautiful satin dress she made me.  It was the most elegant thing I had ever worn.  She fussed over the slippery material for a week, getting it just right.  It fit me like a glove. The memory of that time is precious to me.  Every day I would come home and she would come home from work and she would fit me.  It took several adjustments to get it right.  It was lovely and no one else had "my" dress.  When I went to the prom my senior year, someone had a cape made of the same material as the dress she made me for that dance- it was he dress I wore as a bridesmaid in my sister's wedding four months before.

My mom loved to sew.  She used to make all our clothes.  I think it was her relaxation.I did not get that gene.  I knit ( and still make her slipper pattern when I can) crochet, embroider and needlepoint, but I hate sewing.  Sorry Mom.

So, if I seem a bit weepy or far away today, please excuse me.   I'm missing my mom. If you still have yours, give her an extra hug or a phone call. She's a gift you will miss when she is gone.